What you can expect
Through the therapeutic process we work together as a team in a top down and a bottom up approach. In the beginning, we may focus on tools and techniques that we can put into place immediately to reduce challenges, suffering, or struggle in your life. This may be all you are looking for and I would be happy to help with that! If you would like to go further, we begin the bottom up approach, where I get to truly know you as a person and help you work through thought patterns and coping mechanisms that might hinder you currently.
I believe each person is different and I will tailor with you, your therapeutic experience to fit your needs. Most importantly I work with you to bring to light where your strengths lie and how to find more meaning from your own life and your current relationships. I work as an Adlerian Therapist, which allows me to see each individual for who they are, to recognize that no two people are the same, and to understand that we all face life differently. With couples I integrate Adlerian and RLT approaches to help couples though conflict and repair.
You can read more about both Approaches below.
More about Individual Adlerian Psychotherapy
Healthy & unhealthy relationships, whether it be with ourselves, friends, romantic partners, work relationships, family, or parenting, were a mystery that I wanted to unlock and understand. Of course, I was therefore drawn to the Adlerian Perspective when I entered into the world of psychology. This theory looks at the whole of the individual to understand drives, motivations, actions, and reactions in the world. Meaning, that nothing we do exists in singularity by itself. We act and move in the world as a cohesive whole and we are driven by the sum of our experiences and the meaning we have made from them. Every behaviour and action we take can be understood from who we are as a whole and the lens in which we see the world from.
As an Adlerian therapist, we believe that everything we do, say, and think has all been beneficial for us at one point in our lives (even if it does not make sense to the outside world). We developed these coping mechanisms and way of life to adapt and thrive/ survive in our surroundings. These surroundings always involved relationships with others. In our early years these relationships cognitively developed the foundation for how we view love, friendship, safety, our own abilities, emotional connection, gender roles, sexuality, and so much more. We then shape how we see ourselves, and our understanding of others based on our experiences as we continue to move through the world. As our surroundings and relationships change, we sometimes get stuck in these old tracks/ narratives and ways of being, and without noticing it we may create challenges for ourselves in our present day.
Through this lens, I value and understand the uniqueness and internal motivations of each individual & together we uncover this. What may present as being stuck, challenging, difficult, or an inability to change can all be understood and worked through. Adlerian Therapy is a powerful way to connect to you as a client and view life through your eyes to enable healing and change.
More about my Couples Approach- RLT
I have loved working with couples and understanding the dynamics of a relationship since my masters thesis was completed on this topic in 2014. In 2023, I decided to take my knowledge and skill to another level by completing a two year certification in Relational Life Therapy which was developed by renowned couples therapist, Terrence Real. Terry Real, has specialized in getting to the the heart of issues with couples, breaking cycles, addressing the real pain, and helping them heal and repair. He developed this training method for therapists in the early 1980's and has perfected it over the last 40 years.
The RLT approach to working with couples addresses that two people are coming into the room, usually with very different ideas about the problems and issues that they face in their relationship. The relationship is treated as the client and as an RLT therapist I hold each person accountable for their role in the dynamic and cycle. We discuss patterns and these roles you each play and address the desire for change. Once that is established we move forward by understanding how you got there in the first place. We can understand this by working through family dynamics and history, how this plays into expectations, and what each person does when they feel unheard/ unseen/ unappreciated/ & unsafe in the couple. We begin to understand one another from a place of empathy, vulnerability, and accountability. When we can reach this place, we can learn how to properly repair. In the repair phase of RLT, I coach the couple in techniques that they can now use in the new dynamic that is created. The goal of RLT couples therapy is to help the couple create a healthier and more intimate relationship.
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